ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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