he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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