Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Everyone says I win the strip club
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize