i would punch a child for taco bell
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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