dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
