spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
