Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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