Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
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