I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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