Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Randomize
