That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
