How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
When are your genitals available?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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