3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
it wasn't lemon gatorade
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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