is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
