Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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