I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i think i have two assholes
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
