I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Enjoy the penises
I'm too high and old for this...
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
