I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
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