i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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