Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
21 People That Had The Worst Birthdays Imaginable
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.