FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
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He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
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I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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