AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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