I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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