Dual....:-)
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
