I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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