Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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