Your mouth is God's brothel.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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