There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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