Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality