Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up

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(763): View more from Minnesota

Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.

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(931): View more from Tennessee

I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes

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(631): View more from New York

She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(210): View more from Texas

I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...

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(425): View more from Washington

Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them

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(336): View more from North Carolina

Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here

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(716): View more from New York

Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl

(585): View more from New York

Find him and marry him.

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