So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
i out mim tonsoeep
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