where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
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someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
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ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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