There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
So many bounce houses so little time
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
