PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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