you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i came on her dog
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
