That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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