Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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