Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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