I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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