3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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