I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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