She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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