I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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