You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
