Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
