I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
