He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
