is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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