he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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