YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
