why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
