What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Ladies don't puke and tell
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
