We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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